Hailing from the outskirts of Los Angeles, singer-songwriter Halo Kitsch is ready to let us see completely through her artistry as she unveils her most personal project to date, with the single “i was a virgin (on drugs).” “Bottom line, this is a story about a boy who nearly frickin’ ruined a girl,” she starts, reflecting on the inspirations behind the track. “But the good news is, and the strength resonating through the song is… I’m still here, I’m just mad as hell. So, he failed.”
The blistering track screams anger, anguish, and regret, as it sees Halo exploring her first experience with drugs and wrestling with her feelings towards the boy who gave them to her. “I think everyone’s been the daisy before, whether it was life, circumstance, or relationships that tried to cut them down. I found forgiveness for myself in this song when I finally admitted that I wasn’t the only one at fault, that in some way, I’d fallen victim and still came out alive on the other side,” she reflects.
Driven by searing guitar arrangements and infectious drum patterns, mixed with Kitsch’s evocatively piercing vocal performance, the track is a treat of pop excellence destined to please crowds. Here, we connect with the singer-songwriter to understand more about the inspirations behind the track, her creative process and what’s next in her career ladder.
Listen to the single…
Read the full interview…
Hi there! Thanks for chatting with us and congratulations on your new single. Can you tell us about the story and inspirations behind the track?
Hi! and thank you so much for listening – it means a lot to me that you enjoyed it. This is actually one of my favorites – and it started off in such a strange way. I was watching the first Avatar, ha, and Michelle Rodriguez has that line “fucking daisy cutters.” She’s referring to the human race as they’ve begun to wreak havoc on Pandora. I was intrigued. I typed it furiously and in all caps into my notes app (where I keep a lot of ideas) and it sat there for months just bouncing around in my head while I continued to write about other things. As I sought out new inspiration I realized that I’d written the majority of my music about being 21… and you’ll notice I have a tendency to blame myself for everything that’s gone wrong in my life.
I’d never reflected on what it felt like to be 17, or to try drugs for the first time, or how I really felt now towards the person who introduced me to them. And suddenly, I was a daisy… and I had a cutter. It was sort of a relief to divert some fault outwards on the world around me. The song tumbled out of my brain quickly from there and I eagerly brought it to Ben Zelico (my long-time producer)… he created something that sounds like how the lyrics feel. It’s hard to describe.. but in the same way that the post chorus of my track “A Hit of You (A Bit of You)” sounds like a high & a come down, the bridge of “i was a virgin (on drugs)” grips me like a scene of Euphoria, like an uncomfortable and exhilarating inhale. That’s probably why I find it to be so addictive- I could listen to this one on loop, hah, and it would make me so happy if my listeners feel the same way.
How did you first get into music? Who were your earliest inspirations?
I remember my mom handing me four CDs at a really young age; Sheryl Crow, Lenny Kravitz, The Chicks, and one by my biological father. I’d say those were my earliest inspirations… My dad playing ACDC and The New Radicals as we drove around the Santa Monica Mountains cleaning pools or going to baseball practice, singing along to the radio in my grandmother’s old yellow Volvo, it’s almost like I can still smell the air on the freeway with the window down and the breeze in my hair belting out music: I have always been very attracted to the feeling of freedom that I get when I sing.
I wrote my first song around 13 – it was called “Deer in the Headlights.” Singing my own words around the house, hearing my sister sing them back to me – that was indescribable. I took piano lessons for a while, on and off. I ended up teaching myself. Funnily enough, I’ve never admitted before that I learned Taylor Swift songs first… and once I knew enough chords, I used them to write my own. I finished the first one that I thought was any good during the summer after my first year of college – that was called “f l a w l e s .” I haven’t stopped since.
Where do you find inspiration for your craft? Can you tell us a bit about your creative process?
I’m a words girl. There have been times that words and a melody came to me simultaneously but I’ve never started with only a melody. It’s always been something I had to say. It’s not often as random as the movie Avatar haha. It usually begins with a train of thought, for example… “God, why is our love so uneven?” or “I was born in leather pants.” The hardest part for me, is usually building around that. I’m most successful when my original idea finds its home as the verse, and I build the chorus special. But I’m constantly exploring new ways to write, new approaches to the method, and new ways to refresh my creative process.
Everyone is different. I love being in the room with somebody who can write about a story that isn’t their own – it’s a skill I haven’t mastered yet. All of my songs are so narrative and so personal that you could point to any lyric and I’d have an explanation: my supermarket was Trader Joe’s, the girl he chose over me was named Rachel, etc. The willingness of that vulnerability I think is what connects me so deeply to my listeners. They all have their own supermarkets they think of and different names that come to mind as I sing and we bond over those similarities often in my personal inbox.
How do you see your artistic evolution since your first EP? What changed most from the artist you were then to the one you are now?
Well the EP was a huge dimensional shift for me. My energy changed after Jill died – I was mad, frustrated, confused, vengeful… I was listening to darker music and I sure as hell rode out a darker mood. The EP leaned way more into our rock elements versus everything preceding it, which was more pop/rock. It was a really neat thing to explore another facet of myself, to show my little world another side of me. It stretched me as an artist, showed me what I was capable of, inspired experimentation.
I endorse a certain quantity of rumination when it comes to difficult feelings, I think grieving is a long and challenging process and that you have to allow it time and space in order to move through it. However, I also want to make songs that lift people up, songs that embody happier feelings – and so we are currently in a stage of splitting the difference between the vibe of my earlier tunes and that of my later ones. I think my recent singles “(momma said) not the rockstar” and “i was a virgin (on drugs)” execute that really well and I’m confident in saying that both of those songs set a really great tone regarding what to expect from me moving forward.
Do you have any dream collaborations?
Artist-wise, my dream collaborators are Machine Gun Kelly and Kesha. Gosh, I think both of them would absolutely crush a verse on “i was a virgin (on drugs)” specifically. Early Kesha and later MGK have both been wildly influential for me as I narrow down my sound and my message to the world. Producer-wise, I would kill to work with Evan Blair – and as a byproduct of that, Nessa Barrett. I’ve really enjoyed witnessing them evolve and I find a lot of parallels between our styles.
How would you define your artistic essence today?
Hmm, a good question. Tricky. I’ll be honest, it makes me bummed sometimes that I’ll never be the sort of musician whose entire discography you could play for a baby. I’ll never be wholesome enough to collaborate with Disney channel or Sesame Street. I represent something different. My story is far less talked about, but that doesn’t make me any less strong. I’m here to know that, to emphasize that. The majority of people are never going to relate to being a virgin high on drugs. Good for them, frankly -honestly! But there’s a certain breed of us that are a little too sensitive, and a little too intelligent. The world feels strange, and something inside of us feels wrong.. it’s unsettling & it’s isolating… and that’s where I come in. That’s who I’m for.
One could find me provocative, or one could find me brave, honest (I like to consider myself all of the above). And you could think to yourself, “there’s a path I’d never want to take” or you could think “thank god there’s someone standing at the end of it to show whoever got lost the way through.” My artistic essence is that toughness, the hope that shines through an outer exterior hardened by survival, the little girl still inside of the suit of armor, someone who found a way to laugh again, dance again, sing again… someone who turned out okay after all, someone who gets it. I’ll be honest, I wasn’t so sure what you meant by essence so I asked someone to read my answer and they said I’m long winded (I am). I’ll sum it up… One could probably capture my essence in my aesthetic or looking around my first studio apartment; an ashtray adorned with the butt of a Marlboro Crush, atop a stack of One Direction CDs, or a skull shaped empty tequila bottle, that I’d filled with fake pink flowers, holding up a shelf of mental wellness/zodiac books.
Do you have any live performances lined up? What can fans expect from your concerts?
Yes! Yes. Yay! We’re closing the show for We Found New Music at Grant Owen’s “Grantsgiving” held at Hotel Ziggy on 11/22 haha. I love WFNM, the room always feels like your partying with family. It was the first show I ever played and that was one of the best nights of my life. Then we take on Los Globos 11/28 with Major Stage – I’ve never been to the venue before so I’m really excited to play somewhere new.
Live shows are such a thrill – it’s like the difference between a Zoom meeting and gathering in person… community comes to life, faces become people. There’s a rawness to me that is underlying in our polished product – playing live, that rawness is front and center, lol. I love love love adding new layers to the music and live versions definitely feel like a little more is revealed… I talk a little about the songs, I switch a word up here or there, and the emotion behind each lyric gets very real. At the last WFNM show, everyone sang along to the last song and we all held up our middle fingers together. It was something really special to me.
Where do you see yourself taking your artistry in the coming years?
I’ll take this as far as it’ll go. There’s more people out there who need me, heck, there’s people who haven’t been through what’s gonna make them need me yet, I hope one day they find me. I hope our community continues to grow, in every sense of the word; grow in numbers and grow as people.
Looking backwards, how do you reflect on 2023? What were some pivotal moments for your career and artistry?
Feels like a century ago but I started this year with releasing 4 tracks from the debut EP featuring some of my favorite artists, which shockingly, I’m lucky enough to call my friends: Cowboy Mugshot, Tessa Rae, Benjamin Carter, and Rokeaux. With every “yes” from one of them I was filled with a beautiful reciprocity of adoration. Witnessing these idols of mine build around my own little silly creations was so beyond cool. They believed in me. These wickedly talented genius minds, all of whom resided on my list of recent listens… believed in me. That encouragement and validation fueled and comforted me at the same time. I do think it was a pivotal moment for me this year as it propelled me into my next stage with new invigoration.
We did indeed go on to make three of my favorite songs including “i was a virgin (on drugs).” A second moment was the making of our music video for “no money & no friends.” I got to show myself in a new light. My music videos before had all been derived from my usual edgy, badass, rocker attitude. In ‘no money & no friends’, I got bare – literally. I was butt naked. It was feminine and pretty, but you still saw my sass peeking in (even nude I’m covered in tats, and I made myself as pretty as possible just to sit on a toilet like I was taking a piss). That balance was really fun for me and opened me up to a new avenue of expressing myself. I’ve always thought I had to show up tough and angry to be myself – turns out, I can be a little more creative with it, and that was a fun realization.
What are you most excited about in 2024? Any projects or collaborations in the pipeline you’d like to share with us?
Nope! I’m manifesting some cool shit – I’m too superstitious to jinx it. There’s much in the mix that I’ll keep quiet for now. I’m excited about quite a few things and all I can say is that I suspect my audience will feel similarly… but a scorpio never reveals their secrets too soon.