It’s more than a little painful to write this whilst ticketless and suitably bereft, but we’re not about to let our own feelings hinder the transmission of some important Beyoncé news. Her Majesty opened her ‘Formation’ world tour in Miami last night, and it wasn’t just the Beyhive who were giddily excited – Olivier Rousteing, who outfitted Bey in custom Balmain, was understandably ever so slightly chipper too.
Queen Bey and her dancers took to the stage in white, lace-panelled leotards with ruffle details; the dancers’ leotards were finished with metallic gold belts, whilst Bey’s was adorned with a giant brooch detail at the collar. Rousteing took to Instagram to celebrate the meeting of two cultural greats, captioning a series of photos, “WHEN BALMAIN ARMY BECOMES BEY ARMY”, plus a couple of praise hands and heart emojis for good measure.
Our second response to the images, after spending the requisite 360 consecutive minutes just absorbing Beyoncé’s perfection, was to conjure up an unassailable plot. Maybe if we too become an internationally acclaimed fashion design virtuoso when the next tour comes around, we’ll have VIP access like Rousteing and won’t, instead, be unable to buy tickets because it’s a week shy of payday and we stupidly took on an absurdly expensive degree whilst forgetting even to budget for any future Beyoncé event because we’re UNWORTHY INGRATES WHO DON’T EVEN DESERVE TO WATCH LEMONADE. Ahem. Anyway.
We’d be remiss to discuss Bey’s tour wardrobe without a little mention of a certain delicious piece of merch. You may recall that in possibly the most egregious wilful misinterpretation of 2016, the Miami Fraternal Order of Police voted to boycott Beyoncé’s opening tour date. They claimed that her Formation video and Black Panthers inspired Super Bowl performance – in which she decried police brutality and institutional racism whilst celebrating her Black heritage – displayed an ‘anti-police message’. How did Queen Bey respond? By selling t-shirts reading “BOYCOTT BEYONCÉ”, of course. After all, as she tells us in “Formation”, the best revenge is your paper.