Smile or sigh, it’s Cupid’s Day. Some call it Valentine’s, some call it Galentine’s, some call it another day in the calendar. But underneath it all, it’s a day of gifting. Sure, there’s exhaustive lists out there about every plume of roses and heart-shaped cookies to give your loved one, but where’s the gifts for the non-believers, the cynics and the rest of us single gallies?

Away with your chocolate trays, spa treatments and searching for your soul mate. Today, we blast nothing but ‘thank u, next’ and revel in love-busting satire that comes our way. Eschewing stereotypical declarations of love, love yourself instead – and at the expense of your ex – with Timex’s second collaborative efforts with the audacious French artist, Romaric André.

Better known by his moniker, seconde/seconde/, André brings unexpected, punchy jibes to the dial of a watch, reminding an industry built on tradition and craftsmanship that it’s OK to have a little fun sometimes. So in the spirit of one of the most depressing days of the year, Timex have offered up their Q Timex timepiece as the canvas to let you know that your taste in previous partners certainly isn’t as precious as this watch.

First released in 1979, the original diver-inspired Q Timex gave a new generation a modern Timex® watch with quartz technology, including the true-to-the-era woven stainless-steel bracelet, functional battery hatch, rotating top ring, luminescent paint and ticking inside is a modern quartz movement.

But it’s the dial that really makes this watch tick, if you will. Your dutiful friends have probably cussed the heartbreaker out enough to you, but if you need an objective opinion, Timex will tell you the same: Your ex is a loser. Literally. Look down at your new watch dial darling and realise the past is in the past.

Sooth the wounds with this provocative piece to kickstart (a great start) or continue your watch collection with unique dial markings and a rotating second hand, giving the middle finger to the anthology of your exes. But know that in a 24-hour window, it’s going to point at you twice because, let’s be frank, you’re also the loser for dating such a loser. But hey, we’ve all had to kill time at some point, right?

The Timex x seconde/seconde/ Loser collection will be available from and Timex.co.uk and Farfetch.com.