The Spring 2013 campaigns are here, and they’re taking the Internet by storm. But hidden depths lurk in these glossy ads, whether they be Chanel, Miu Miu or Mulberry. We decode the campaigns for you…
Most likely to set off metal detectors in airports: Tom Ford
Karlina Caune photographed by Tom Ford.
“I’m sorry, ma’am, I’m going to have to ask you to step aside.”
Most likely to come runner-up in Splash: Hermès
Iselin Steiro photographed by Nathaniel Goldberg.
We’re not the only ones who were disappointed Tom Daley didn’t spend the entire show with his top off, right?
Most likely to sing This Charming Man at karaoke: Saint Laurent Paris
Edie Campbell photographed by Hedi Slimane.
“Ugh, Eye of the Tiger is NOT an indie song.”
Most likely to secretly be a Magic Eye illusion: Louis Vuitton
Janice Alida, Athena Wilson, Bria Condon, Magdalena Jasek, Ji Hye Park, Tian Yi,
Ruby Jean Wilson, and Nastya Kusakina photographed by Steven Meisel.
If you squint hard enough, Ji Hye turns into a giant 3D horse.
Most likely to stare unceasingly into your eyes and call it ‘art’: Givenchy
Marina Abramovic and Mariacarla Boscono photographed by Mert and Marcus.
Seriously, Abramovic, quit with the creepy eyes.
Most likely to be the flaky friend who never wants to go out: Chanel
Stella Tennant and Ondria Hardin photographed by Karl Lagerfeld.
“Soho House again? Um… I’ve got a migraine, babes. You have fun without me.”
Most likely to be the product of helicopter parenting: Burberry
Romeo Beckham, Charlie France and Edie Campbell photographed by Mario Testino.
Victoria on location: “So after this shoot, Romeo, you’re scheduled for flute practice, swimming class, Mandarin lessons and then two hours of interview prep for Eton.”
Most likely to turn up to a family funeral wearing something inappropriate: Dolce & Gabbana
Photographed by Domenico Dolce.
“But this see-through black tulle dress is what Uncle Keith would’ve wanted.”
Most likely to be really into the cover of David Bowie’s new album: Proenza Schouler
Julia Nobis photographed by David Sims.
The resemblance is uncanny.
Most likely to have a Wallpaper subscription: Alexander McQueen
Raquel Zimmermann photographed by David Sims.
“I love lamp.”
Most likely Tilda Swinton fan: Alexander Wang
Malgosia Bela photographed by Steven Klein.
“Watching Orlando changed, like, my whole outlook on gender.”
Most likely to be into #seapunk: Mulberry
Meghan Collison photographed by Tim Walker.
“Let’s get wavvy, guys!”
Most likely to spend way too long in the toilet: Marc by Marc Jacobs
Photographed by Juergen Teller.
“What the hell is he DOING in there? Someone get security.”
Most glamorous Women’s Institute meeting ever: Miu Miu
Bette Franke, Adriana Lima, Doutzen Kroes, and Malgosia Bela photographed by Inez van Lamsweerde and Vinoodh Matadin.
“Alright ladies, first things first: smash the patriarchy, then we can get mani-pedis.”
Most likely to have Louis Smith as a fitness idol: Kenzo
Ming Xi and Jester White photographed by Jean Paul Goude.
“Rio 2016, here we come!”
Words: Zing Tsjeng